Do you catch yourself using the S word a lot? You know….should. I find it’s often put in a sentence begrudgingly or with guilt.
“I should go to the gym”
“I should eat healthier”
“I should spend less time on social media”
Certainly there are things we all should do regardless of how weighty it may seem. Like, I should pay my taxes or risk jail time. Fine. But what about in the context of how we think we should or should not dress? I often hear statements such as, “I shouldn’t wear skinny jeans anymore, right?” or “I should not wear these anymore or people will know I am a Millennial (love that one)”.
Listen, if we are dressing for other people, the long-term effects are going to be not so long-term. It’s not a compelling enough reason to get your ass in gear and to stop wearing easy, garbage clothes. The more motivating reason to change or elevate your style is if you do it from a place that brings you joy and freedom. Sounds like I just dropped a bunch of fluff doesn’t it? But think about it this way…
You have an upcoming beach trip with the girls and you are motivated to push the chips and queso aside for a few weeks and get your butt in the gym. But what happens afterwards? It’s back to your old ways because the short-term reason has passed. You did it for the ‘gram and not for your actual health and physical shape. Same goes for your personal style. If you are motivated by what others think (you probably have particular “others” in mind) and dressing for an event or a “should”, that isn’t sustainable. Eventually, you will get tired of doing that because the “why” isn’t powerful enough to continue.
As a stylist, I navigate the “should I be wearing this?” question a little differently. I want to know how it makes you feel, do you love it, how do you wear it? As I mature as a person, so does my approach to helping women with their personal style. I want you to develop a style without should and shouldn’t being a big factor. This is especially important as you approach your fall style. I will always guide you to what styles and silhouettes are trending for the season if you want to know that. However, I hope you will create a style for yourself this fall that feels like one you created for you and not out of obligation or shoulds.
Can you think of ways you have changed your style because of a should? Maybe you have always done that so it’s hard to untangle it from how you actually want to present yourself. If you are feeling stuck, let me help you.